View Full Version : How many agree with these?
kevnmcd
07-15-2005, 01:06 PM
How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really ! bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know! when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives? They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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just another payment
07-15-2005, 01:14 PM
those are funny.
why do brides wear white?
so they will match the appliances
DCfive
07-15-2005, 01:14 PM
Funny... http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif
E502.5
07-15-2005, 01:16 PM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif BITE ME Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif Try living without US! ... You had to know I couldn't sit still (being a woman that I am) and not say anything! Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif (but those are funny too). Its ok... I have to deal with all the blonde jokes too http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
DCfive
07-15-2005, 01:17 PM
He warned you not to read them. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif
E502.5
07-15-2005, 01:21 PM
He doesn't scare me! Im a big girl, I can take it. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/aktion033.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
kevnmcd
07-15-2005, 01:55 PM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (DCfive @ July 15 2005, 2:17 pm)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">He warned you not to read them. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/wink.gif[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
Yeah! Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif
Of course I did write that in the topic to lure them in. Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/devil.gif
Mrs. Red-N-Vegas
07-15-2005, 02:42 PM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif Those were VERY funny!! Â*I laugh hardily!! Thanks for the good laugh today!
By the way http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/devil.gif Â*How do you cut a man's sex drive?? Â*Talk to the doctor about boats while your husbands on the table getting snipped!!!! Â*Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif
red_n_vegas
07-15-2005, 02:59 PM
not funny!!!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/cussing.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/up_yours.gif Cari http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/asshole2.gif
Mrs. Red-N-Vegas
07-15-2005, 03:03 PM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif Oh...but I am SURE you had a REAL BIG chuckle about the other statements above...RIGHT Scott??? http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif
red_n_vegas
07-15-2005, 03:05 PM
I am soooooo glad your going back to work!!!!
I get my peace back. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/boxing1.gif
Mrs. Red-N-Vegas
07-15-2005, 03:10 PM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif NO...your glad I'm going back to work because you get your KITCHEN back...by the way, your apron is hanging on the wall waiting for you!!!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif
red_n_vegas
07-15-2005, 03:12 PM
ya me cook !! ok http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/thumb.gif
Red Horse
07-15-2005, 04:11 PM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (red_n_vegas @ July 15 2005, 4:12 pm)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">ya me cook !! ok http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/thumb.gif[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
Scott, Pretzels and beer doesnt require cooking. Just some ice for the cooler and a kid to get you another beer. You should be good to go!!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/drinkers.gif
38cig
07-15-2005, 07:11 PM
ok i admit it i loved um http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/beerchug.gif
PUMP 'HER'
07-15-2005, 07:29 PM
By far one of the best posts you have ever had Kevin!
LASINC
07-17-2005, 09:54 PM
Now that there is funny.
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif
Akamatsu
07-18-2005, 06:51 AM
That was some funny stuff...
both Kevin's post, as well as the RNV's going back and forth.. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/thumb.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
kevnmcd
07-18-2005, 06:53 AM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (PUMP 'HER' @ July 15 2005, 8:29 pm)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">By far one of the best posts you have ever had Kevin![/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
Why thank you! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/bowdown.gif
titties and beer
07-18-2005, 06:23 PM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Mrs. Red-N-Vegas @ July 15 2005, 5:10 pm)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">by the way, your apron is hanging on the wall waiting for you!!!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
focking OUCH!good one mrs. rnv http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/beerchug.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/thumb.gif
red_n_vegas
07-19-2005, 07:49 AM
Ya she can really cut deep when she wants too http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/traurig001.gif
Mrs. Red-N-Vegas
07-19-2005, 07:52 AM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif Oh for goodness sakes, I didn't mean to make you cry!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/devil.gif
kevnmcd
07-19-2005, 10:03 AM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (Mrs. Red-N-Vegas @ July 19 2005, 08:52 am)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/tounge.gif Oh for goodness sakes, I didn't mean to make you cry!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif Â* Â*http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/devil.gif[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
I thought it was the women that were always touchy....what a baby! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/laugh.gif
PUMP 'HER'
07-19-2005, 10:53 AM
You two are too much. I'm soooo glad Danielle has too much work to do at work so she doesn't have time to even look in here. I'm sure she would be giving me he same crap.
LASINC
07-19-2005, 11:01 AM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (PUMP 'HER' @ July 19 2005, 11:53 am)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">You two are too much. Â*I'm soooo glad Danielle has too much work to do at work so she doesn't have time to even look in here. Â*I'm sure she would be giving me he same crap.[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
I second that!
Thank goodness my wife has no idea how to post on here. otherwise it would be non-stop http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/argue.gif
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/biggrin.gif
PUMP 'HER'
07-19-2005, 11:05 AM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/grinser010.gif http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/rollinglaugh.gif I'm sure it would be the same for many of us.
red_n_vegas
07-19-2005, 11:54 AM
my bigest fuck up was showing Cari how to post and all...J/K just playing with you Babe.
PUMP 'HER'
07-19-2005, 12:04 PM
</span><table border="0" align="center" width="95%" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1"><tr><td>Quote (red_n_vegas @ July 19 2005, 12:54 pm)</td></tr><tr><td id="QUOTE">...J/K just playing with you Babe.[/QUOTE]<span id='postcolor'>
Nice try Scott but I think the hammer is comming on this one. http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smashfreak.gif
Mrs. Red-N-Vegas
07-19-2005, 05:54 PM
http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smlove2.gif Yes HONEY you were soooo nice to SHOW me how to post!! http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/smlove2.gif I thought the REAL reason you gave me my own name was so I would quit posting under your name!?? http://www.lasvegashotboats.com/iB_html/non-cgi/emoticons/inlove.gif
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